"you are an amazing speaker/personality/leader/orator/person(as such)", are frequent phrases that fall on my ears, But recently a rare set of words fell on my ear drums, and left the diaphragm with heavy vibrations of high amplitudes and even now I can tune a tuning fork of high frequency to create resonance. "Such people (like me) are dual personalities, never keep in touch with them!"
I started wondering, How people who have never had, even a single conversation with me, have derived this conclusion about me. But when this hit my ears, I knew my introspection habit would lead my thoughts into some sort of analysis, and this is what I could gather from this random explosion of thoughts that happened, which expanded in all possible directions and still expanding, like the universe after the big bang.
One of directions I analysed, led me to this thought - that all of us, by nature of this civilization we have created, have to maintain multiple personalities, behaviours and attitudes under different situtations, as the need may be. We have to carry ourselves in different ways at different times.
None of us, would open up ourselves completely to strangers, so we put up an image which is commonly put up to strangers, and then slowly once the person begins to keep in touch or the contact persists(for known/unknown objectives as the case maybe), we slowly open up and our "trueself"(which am yet to analyse what it means) rather the so called "true self" comes out.
I feel this word "trueself" is the reflection of the core inner beliefs/character/attitudes and deeper exposure of an individual to the other person, rather than it being the "other side".
My arguement in this write-up only stands to explain, that its not "other side", but that we all have a deeper look of ours, which people miss. The Surface has to bear looks which are made up to suit the needs of the, then objectives and as the time passes by, the depth gets revealed, and what probably for some people means, the other side, is that when deeper self is opposite in nature to the surface, thats when people feel cheated and claim it to be the other side. What I truly feel is that, a few meetings and conversations with a person would reveal the inner self of that individual, only then one has the complete right to conclude or rather describe that person.
Majority of us would have formed our conclusions based on our experiences with a few set of people, few set of conversations or experiences we would have had. But the kind of experience I have had in my life, of having met people in huge numbers from all back-grounds and walks of life, and actually having spent time with them, I have come to realise that judgements on basis of similarity are partially correct only and not completely reliable and judgements without an interaction at all with any individual are as good as predicting the outcome of a dice, you are bound to be having 1-6th correctness in every prediction, which does not make you a genius in any manner.
Some sort of cluster of thoughts on my head, has got resolved to conclude, that the "other side of mine" is the actually the "deeper side" of me and not the other side. If my surface behaviour and my inner most attitudes or behaviours after prolonged interaction with a person are opposites - Under such situations my deeper side, shall get reflected as my other side:):)
Preserve your originality even though you have to pretend under many circumstances, but thats not how world is, you have to pretend at times! There is no option.
Expecting comments column of this blog to teach me a lot in this regard, expecting you to pour down your perception on this. Does every body have an other side? Or is it only me? or do I actually have another side? If yes, I am yet to discover:)
PHEW...!!! This blog has been just a collection of random thoughts, as good as garbage and unusable waste. But people have built gardens with available waste around them, is what I read in school days and was thrilled. So, am expecting the same, atleast from one of the readers, to be one such personality, hope you are not a dual one:) Create taste with waste!